First of all I want to encourage you in this fact, THE HOLY SPIRIT HAS NOT LEFT YOU!!!!
The fact that you are trouble by such a thing is evidence that you are a believer.

Question: What makes you think that you did not really receive the Lord as a teenager?

Here is the deal. Do you believe that Jesus Christ is the Son of God, who became a human being, lived the perfect life that you could not live, died on a cross for all of us, and then rose from the dead?

If you do, here is what the bible says about you: I (You) have been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I (You) who live, but Christ who lives in me (You). Galatians 2:20

In many churches today they can really turn on the pressure at the end of a service and make you feel like you need to do something in order to secure your salvation, or get God to do something in your life, and it makes you feel inadequate about yourself and your relationship to God. There are time the Spirit will move you to act or change some things. I’m not saying He doesn’t.

Again, Do you believe that Jesus Christ is the Son of God, who became a human being, lived the perfect life that you could not live, died on a cross for all of us, and then rose from the dead? It sounds to me like you do.

You do not have to fight and struggle to get to God. The good news of the gospel is that He has come to you! And already made you alive with Christ. When Jesus came here as a man, just like Adam, He was a representative of all of us. The bible says that when he died we all died – the whole human race. That means you.

For the love of Christ controls us, because we have concluded this: that one has died for all, therefore all have died; and he died for all, that those who live might no longer live for themselves but for him who for their sake died and was raised. (2Cor 5:14-15)

And if we died with him we have also been raise with him (all of us). For if we have been united with him in a death like his, we shall certainly be united with him in a resurrection like his. (Rom 6:5) Most people believe this means after we die we will be resurrected, and that is true but, the bible says, For he raised us from the dead along with Christ and seated us with him in the heavenly realms because WE ARE UNITED WITH CHRIST JESUS. (Ephesians 2:6)

I am one who has struggled over the years with my salvation. God’s love is much bigger than all of us give Him credit for. You simply have to believe Him when he says He loves you, and that your sins have been forgiven. Hear me now, GOD LOVES YOU AND YOUR SINS ARE FORGIVEN! Even those who have not yet recognized that Jesus died for them, their sins are forgiven.

To repent simply means to change your mind. Before you heard that Jesus died for your sins you either believed something else or you simply didn’t know. Then you heard the story of God’s love and you changed your mind about God. You now know that because he loved you (the world) he sent His Son to bring you life. You got new knowledge and your mind was changed. That is repentance. The more you learn about God through the Spirit and His word the many more times in your life you will repent, because when you learn something about God that is contrary to what you believe you will have to change your mind.

I want to encourage you to begin to absorb the letters of Paul, especially Galatians, Ephesians, and Colossian. You must begin to focus on God’s love for you. When you know someone loves you, you trust them. YOU DON’T STRIKE ME AS A FOOL WHO SAYS THERE IS NO GOD. Your life – the way you live it – is your confession of what you believe in your heart. No one can live contrary to what they believe.

I hope the Spirit of God will convince (convict) you of what I am trying to convey, that the Father, Son, and Spirit have not left you, but, that you are loved and secure in their love. Knowing and accepting this is enough! Raise you hands in the air and thank Him. Don’t accept the lie that He has left you. God is good. He is your Father. BELIEVE THAT!

In my late 20’s and early 30’s my husband and I began attending a Bible-believing Baptist Church. It was following one of the sermons in late July 2011 that I felt a small tug on my heart to respond to the invitation and receive Jesus as my Lord and Savior. However, because of my pride, I resisted the Holy Spirit’s calling. I argued with the Holy Spirit that I had already received Christ as a teenager (which now I know I did not). Also, I had become involved in the church and was serving in several ministries; so I wrestled with the Holy Spirit about receiving Christ since I “felt” like I had already been saved and more importantly, was ashamed of having to admit that I had been serving and leading in the ministry without being a true believer.
In February 2012, I began to have sleepless nights and loss of appetite because of this wrestling that was going on in my soul. Over the past 2 months, I prayed numerous times the sinner’s prayer and the assurance of salvation prayer in private and also with my husband and with my mother, but the wrestling continued. All the while, I asked the Lord to help me with my pride, as I knew it was the one piece that was holding me back from truly receiving Christ in my heart. Two weeks ago, the “wrestling/calling” left and when it left I heard a voice in my head that said “there’s still a small piece”. Since the “wrestling/calling” left, I have been in complete despair, feeling like my only hope of salvation in Jesus Christ is gone and that I am damned to Hell. I fear that I committed the unpardonable sin and resisted the Holy Spirit so long that He left, never to return. Please help me. Is there anything that I can do to receive Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior and live the rest of my life to glorify Him? How can my hard heart be softened to hear the Holy Spirit again?
I have been spending time in God’s word trying to seek Him, however the passages catch my attention are the passages about “the wicked shall perish.” “a fool in His heart says there is no God.” “once one has fallen away, it is impossible for them to come to repentance.” All that keeps running through my head are the numerous opportunities that the Lord provided for me to confess Him as Lord and believe, and because of my pride, I would not receive Him or confess Him. I keep telling my myself that I need Jesus, He is the only way, but it is like my heart will not believe.